Six Chix: "You must think carefully"

Six Chix: One night at the single cell bar

Six Chix: "I want a commitment!"

Zippy the Pinhead: "kind of edgy and jittery"

Non Sequitur: Putting a degree in philosophy to work

Real Life Adventures: "Mew"

Dinette Set: "I found it right away!"

Diesel Sweeties: "Why can't I quit you?"

Bizarro: "Push, honey!"

Six Chix: "Please visit our website"

Pardon My Planet: "I did turn off my cell phone"

Pardon My Planet: "Are you seeing another man?"

Pardon My Planet: "Go green, babe"

Monty: "A brand new telescope"

9 Chickweed Lane: "a really painful noogie"

9 Chickweed Lane: "We never sinned"

9 Chickweed Lane: "Did you ever...umm..."

Non Sequitur: The never-ending reality show

Dilbert: "So, what happens now?"

Diesel Sweeties: "I get paid to do this"

Bizarro: "We call her J-Lo"

Baby Blues: "Do you know how to do all that?"

Non Sequitur: "That's just my publicist"

Lockhorns: "How come all my mother's emails...?"

Quigmans: "Beware!"

Prickly City: "Stupid study"

Six Chix: Dead man hiking

Six Chix: "Wait! Don't just walk away from this!"

Pardon My Planet: "You've made me very, very happy"

Pardon My Planet: "Money can't buy you happiness"

Pardon My Planet: "We're not spending enough time together"

9 Chickweed Lane: "Get a room"

9 Chickweed Lane: "Pathetic, antediluvian boob"

Heart of the City: "Are you hot in here?"

Bizarro: "Did you call my ringtone 'lame', mister?"

Sherman's Lagoon: "A whole new lifestyle"

Sylvia: "Muscular guys get the girls more often"

Lockhorns: "Another hug?"

Shoe: "That song was right from my heart"

Dilbert: "I'm pretty sure that was you again"

Non Sequitur: "No, I don't want to stop"

Pardon My Planet: "Run for your lives!!"

Pardon My Planet: "The bad news is..."

Pardon My Planet: "Actually, I do have an opening"

Crock: "I'm going in to confess my sins"

Hi & Lois: "Heaven is the Hall of Fame"

Bizarro: First date

Six Chix: "Cute!"

(With necessary credit to Charles Schultz, please.)

Mother Goose & Grimm: "Hallelujah, it's Lassie!"

Pearls Before Swine: "Your call is important to us"